Sorry Darling, No Updates

I feel so guilty for not having documented your days and years more. I am currently trying to archive my FB updates involving you... But those are mostly just funny, silly convos. None are the heartfelt worries and challenges you present to us.

Right now, you are already sleeping as I type this. You were so sad that Pappie refuses to sleep beside you (coz Yamee is in the middle and it's BBB). I explained to you that you have to stay on my side of the bed so I can nebulize you later, and Pappie is so tired from his trip, he also just wants to get a good night's rest. I asked you to think about it, and think about Pappie's sacrifices for us too.

I still struggle in teaching you to be content... We still have a lot of good days wherein you'll end up in tears and complaining because one very small thing wasn't granted you.

But I cannot really accuse you of being selfish and discontent, because you still show enthusiasm for any little thing.

You wear size 33 shoes now... And has started wushu lessons. Unfortunately, the change in weather had your asthma attacking. I am actually very worried about your asthma, mainly that you have been on Cetirizine for the better oart of last year and all of this year. I am worried about your liver, and the med's effects on your long-term health.

We struggle with homeschooling (you are in Grade 1 now) mainly because of me. Mommy went thru a personal crisis in 2013... One that she is still trying to really overcome so she can just meet all the challenges head on. It is affecting our homeschooling because I have been ambivalent, complacent and unstructured. And the pregnancy isn't helping either.

I love you. Of course, I still do. Sometimes it is so bittersweet for me to realize how you have really let Yamee have more of me, resigned that you are the Kuya that has to give way to him. But it also makes me so proud to see you ever watchful of him, ever protective of him. I love that you have come up with your own games with him... Something that you two alone get.

You still make me smile whenever I see you curled up in a book. You can read well now but still somehow refuse to do so unless you want to. Together with Yamee, you have turned my pristine Calvin n Hobbes books into tattered ones. But how can I complain? You mastered reading when I was always in pain last year due to my gallstones...

Sometimes you will dream of becoming an explorer... But sometimes you tell me you want to stay with us rather than explore the world on your own. Sometimes, you talk about having a wife and kids of your own, already mulling over the decision of whether you will let them borrow your toys.

You are still such a very sweet child, such a very cheerful child, such a very optimistic child. And I love your growing faith in God, which I credit Awesome Kids with.

You are still missing your front upper teeth! And you are about to lose two lower ones.

I send you to buy rice or viands from the kanto all by yourself now. I also even ask you to heat water for your bath yourself. Small little things that make more self-reliant and independent.

I love you, my darling Kobe. Mommy has been lacking so much and yet you always just love me back, too. We are so lucky to gave you.

Life Got the Better of Me, Panganay

Pappie Jojo: Anak, you're so thin, please eat more ha?
Yakee: Yes, papa... You... You're so soft
Nyahahahaha

*~*~*

Engr Nice ito ang future X-gamer ... And since restricted pa na magsubok siya ng totoong skateboard, tuloy ko muna enthusiasm niya thru fingerboard ehehehhe

*~*~*

Sigh. Ganun ata talaga.

Ang favorite subject ni Yakee is P.E.... The one thing I hate now because it requires me to move, haha.

But Pappie Jojo, I am loving the arnis... So easy to just come up with things to do with it. 
And proof of Yakee's enjoyment... He has not stopped lovingly thanking me, telling me he loves me and requesting for more exercises later.

*~*~*

Yakee just recited, with about 95% accuracy, a 160-word story from memory.

Sometimes, I find myself sighing that he refuses to read the written word... Even if he can already. But God made his ears sharper than his eyes eh, what can I do? 

Bbee... And it's not like we read the Transformers book to him everyday, all the time. Galing no?
Prize naman dyan! Haha

*~*~*

Batang Pinoy = Arnis

(Haha, ekshuli, these will be our exercise sticks for years)

 

*~*~*

Haha... Aliw na aliw ako sa arrow holder nya Pappie Jojo.

*~*~*

Sana lagi silang masaya sa kahon lang... Hehe 

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Yakee just sang the first few lines of Living On The Edge... 

... Thank God he isn't tone deaf like me.

*~*~*

Yesterday...

Me: this... This is the reason why I insist on naps when you have swimming lessons. Because when you don't take a proper one, your behavior turns ugly.

Yakee: you don't love me anymore. You're calling me ugly.

Me: I didn't say you were ugly. I am saying all the whining and arguing and crying is ugly. This is ugly behavior!

Yakee: you're calling me ugly. You are so bad.

Sigh.... I was bad. We don't say UGLY in our family.

Can I blame the blasted heat and brownout?

*~*~*

Yakee is teaching Yamee about the Solar system... Love it! 

Yakee: See, here, this is Mars... That is Saturn. 
Yamee: Ert.

*~*~*

Yakee: why did you fix the bed here?
Me: sorry darling... Despite tito Joram's best efforts, the aircon is still broken so we're sleeping here downstairs.
Yakee: you mean we're always going to sleep here?
Me: well... Mommy and Pappie are going to explore our options... 
Yakee: but how can I sleep upstairs? Tomorrow is BBB (boys in the big bed night)

Awww... Find a way to console panganay Pappie Jojo... He won't accept the sofa bed as 'big bed' e

*~*~*

Yakee: Mommy, just read to me from the tablet ok?
Me: Are you sure? Don't you wan the tablet to just read to you?
Yakee: No... Read to me from the tablet. It's because I want to hear your sweet voice ok?

(Hubs is asleep na... When he reads this, he'd wonder again how our sons could love my singing voice... But not his... Me being tone deaf... Haha... True devotion from sons lang!)

*~*~*

Yakee-isms...

(while playing with Yamee)
Hopia... Hopia, butter popcorn

(san na yung mani, anak? haha)

*~*

Mommy... is it time to eat? Because... because my body is sacred. It has to be fed. And i'm so hungry already!

*~*~*


Watching a Pugutan play may not exactly be the usual way of teaching more about the Bible... but Yakee was enthralled... and now wouldn't shut up about heaven.

*~*~*

Yakee asked if this was yours, Ninang XiAh... When i answered yes, he said next..."ay dapat this is yours"

Pano ba yan? Wahahaha 

*~*~*

In the middle of barfing the other day, Yakee turned to me and said, "It's ok Mommy, I forgive you."

Taken aback, I said, "forgive me for what?"

He answered, "I forgive you for giving me too much grapes. It's okay, I still love you even if you make mistakes."

Sigh... my mistake talaga ha!

*~*~*

Yakee: Mommy, i'm the leader ha? Papa Jesus, thank you that I played with Oona today. Please take care of her and don't let her be sick.

Naks naman Laya... I thought he was going to thank God for the books we bought eh, haha... Pero talagang si Oona ang pinagdasal.

*~*~*

This is fun rolling around! 

*~*~*

When I looked in on the boys before taking a shower, I saw Yakee sliding down the banister.

Me: Iakob! I already asked you to stop doing that because Yamee will immitate you for sure. You knew I was going to take a shower, what if Yamee did that and I wasn't here?
Yakee: Eh, I can catch him naman if he falls eh.
Me: No mahal, you cannot assume that. Even Mommy cannot guarantee that. Remember when yamee fell before, both Mommy and Pappie didn't get to catch him.
(with tears springing in his eyes)
Yakee: But I can catch him because I am the hero. That's why God chose me.

Oh gosh... That shut me up. Had to shower first before taking up the matter again with him.

*~*~*

Yakee: Pappie, do you know why God chose me? (Referring, i think, to why he was our son)

Pappie Jojo: No, why?

Y: Because... He wants me to get angry to you so you will remember to follow God.

And do you know why God chose Yamee? It's because he wants me to remember that we have to be kind to each other. That's why.

(I believed in a concept of a God before I got married, but my faith seems to be growing along with my sons).

*~*~*

Yakee's prayer:
Papa Jesus, please touch Yamee's heart so that he will cooperate and listen better. Please touch Mommy and Pappie Jojo's hearts too so that they will be better.... (prompted by Pappie, 'parents'). And Papa Jesus, thank you that I am behaving better.

(basta something that went like that... I couldn't concentrate on the words kasi I got teary-eyed na... he was mimicking MY prayers but also made it his own... and between him and me, I think God will respond to his prayers better)

*~*~*

While my sis was showing me her yarn purchases for me...

Yakee: Mommy, you are so lucky.
Me: why am I lucky?
Y: Because you have so much yarn.

Haha... I am more happy that he's adopting my prompts of celebrating what one has.

*~*~*

It's the secondd time Yakee has asked me to explain DOOM to him. And weirdly enough, he seems to have picked up the word from a Disney song.. haha

*~*~*

Yakee insisted on reading the next book in our Ball-Stick-Bird series.

Y: Mommy, E
Me: Yes, you remember it has two sounds.
Y: Eh... As in elephant?
Me: And the other one?
Y: Eee... Hmmm, as in eee-bon?

Eto na... Simula na ng Filipino - English confusion.

It's 2013 and You Will Be Enrolled

January 2013 almost ending, I know.

Well... it was a very busy December for us and up to now, Mommy hasn't really mastered the art of domestic chores yet. So, yes, homeschooling has been put on hold. I am so sorry son.

In the meantime. I accidentaly rekindled your fascination for dinosaurs again in a big way. For a time, you were more into superheroes and ninjas already.

You are still adjusting to nurturers having come and gone... we're now going on 3 weeks of your constant/nervous peeing after Ninang Grace left. But happiness though, a fourth of the time, you wash yourself after pooping. Pappie told you that you had to learn that this year... and just like sleeping in your own bed, you just did it. I didn't need to prod you.

You and Yamee are stretching me sooo much currently over your constant squabbles but it's also really nice that you are both at a point where you can really play together, and even gang up on me together.

And health-wise, you were the most brilliant of all because after recovering from colds, you've been clear since with no repeat incidences. Thank you for humoring me with Buteyko exercises. And much as I love you, I really have to wean you off candy.

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Miscellaneous FB Updates:

Proof that language a child is exposed to stays with them... Yakee prefers singing 6 little ducks in Spanish after hearing me play it, when he already knows rhe English version.

*~*

Yakee: Pappie, stop teasing me.
Pappie: Sorry, I just wanted to see if you will share the chocolate.
Me: Pappie was testing you, mahal.
Yakee: Eh Pappie, don't test me, I'm not a robot.

*~*

Yamee fell and hit his head, partly because Kuya pushed the bed he was hanging from. As he was inconsolably crying, Kuya kept saying sorry. At a loss, Yakee started licking the back of his hand and arm... and Yamee stopped crying while watching his brother in fascination. Then he started licking his own arm and finally smiled.

As I was trying not to barf, Yakee said, "Mommy, it's because we're cats, right?"

*~*

Yakee has seesawed between just whining, outright crying and stomping his feet (wag na isipin pano nag-seesaw sa 3 directions!) over ice cream... all because an ice cream man did not give him ice cream.

Nasanay ata sa mga birthday parties na hihingi lang sya, hindi naisip to ask me for money so he can buy. Ayan, depressed :D

Is that good or bad, Pappie Jojo?

*~*

Yakee has been at us to get his head shaved... And I like Yamee without hair... So there!



*~*

Because of a freebie mag on animals, I used the word 'blend' and that ended in a discussion of why and how animals camouflage with Yakee (homeschooling instant subject)... and though I generally veto computer use, Google Images and Youtube came in handy when he said, "Mommy, I wish I can see a chameleon changing colors."

Unfortunately though, he is now wooing me to allow him and Yamee to have a chameleon for a pet.

*~*

In the midst of washing the clothes I couldn't have the laundromat do (read: soiled and uber mucky clothes of the boys), Yakee decided to play DJ with my laptop.

Then he came to me and said, "Mommy, this is my most favorite song for you."

And then I hear the initial strains of 'Can You Feel the Love Tonight?'

Sigh.

It didn't give me energy for the laundry but it did ensure he gets yema tomorrow :D

*~*

Yakee just drew tears on Mama Mary's face (from the printed nativity scene) and told me she's crying coz she had a baby. I asked why Mama Mary would cry and he said..'because for a long time, she didn't have a baby'

Awww... I had to say a prayer for TTC couples tuloy.

*~*

Awww... I just found out that the little wooden bookmarks for Yakee's friends weren't given away this morning... Sorry Yakee's friends! I think my boys forgot in all the excitement :)



*~*

Because Yakee dropped his spoon, I asked hubs to get a spoon from the setting at a nearby empty table at Zamboanga Restaurant. After handing it to Yakee, he asked his dad, " did you steal this?"

*~*

(speaking in a hoarse voice)
Me: Iakob, could you please kiss me on my forehead?
Yakee: Aww (proceeding to grant the request). Why are you talking like that Mommy?
Me: I'm so sick anak.
Yakee: Aww... Can you go to heaven?

Wahh... Bastusan!
(ekshuli ang separation anxiety nya nagma manifest as his fear of me dying. After umalis nung last helper namin, bigla sya uli nagtatanong if I died when I gave birth, mga ganun. Eh 2 days ago, mega iyak sya when I took a separate car from them. Kaya ayan, pinapatay na naman ako!)

*~*

Both boys reached milestones tonight... Which ended in tears for the Bunso whose creation was knocked over by Kuya accidentally.

Sigh.


Yakee finished his first Ball Stick Bird book - Dec 31

*~*
Masahista told me that when she was massaging me when I had the flu, yakee would also massage me while telling me he loved me.

I have no recollection of that... But I do remember waking up coughing and finding Yakee lying down beside me, just watching me sleep.

Sigh. Proof the boys were so neglected that time.

*~*

Yakee: Mommy, let's talk where the foods I eat go to my body, ok?
Me: Ok.
Yakee: But first, let's talk why girls do not have a pututoy.

Needless to say, the best I could do was say boys and girls have differently-shaped pipes/hoses where the pee comes out.

(Kaloka eh... I first tried being technical, saying girls have a different urethra etc... Yakee said, "Oh so girls pee using their pwet?" :D So, fireman's hose it is!)

*~*

It is upsetting to watch your child grapple with the stresses of life. However, I really hope I can find a way to rid Yakee of his morbid tendencies whenever he's faced with separation anxiety... because he also tends to scare me.

Sigh.

*~*

We miss and love you...
 
 Yakee prayed 'thanks for the spaghetti from ninang Josephine and the iPad from ninang XiAh' last night.

*~*
Yakee naman is 57 duplo blocks tall!

Happy Homeschooler... Happy Breather... So Far

Right now... we are undertaking a Buteyko workshop because I really want to wean us from medicines. Unfortunately, it will require around an hour everyday (at around 20 minutes/3x/day) of your cooperation, which is really posing a challenge. I don't want to be scaring you into obedience and compliance... nor dangling bribes your way... because this is for you. Like what I told you, it's because I love you so much that I want you off the meds and just managing your body on your own.

I would be the happiest Mom on earth if this results in the end of asthma for you, forever.

Homeschooling-wise... you have fallen in love with the term. Our rhythm was disrupted this week by the Buteyko sessions but we've managed to squeeze in reading time. I'm glad that, though you get disheartened initially by big words, you still end up tackling them the following day.

And I think I can already say that all in all, you ARE really reading. (You wrote bat and pat on your own at the workshop too, that was so cute!).

I just need to provide more activities for you from now on.

*~*

You still have days where you'd be teasing your brother a lot... or even get really mad at him over a toy... but you also get really upset when you see him in trouble with me, and you always rush to defend him.

I love that you tell me when you're upset with me. I love that you trust me that much. And i'm sorry for the times I really scare you with my temper (yesterday, when I was still hopping mad at Ate Nene and shouting my way through the rage).

*~*

I have kept my dates with you pretty much... and I know you like that. Last week, you suddenly had this desire to ride an elephant so Pappie and I are now exploring ways to deliver that desire.

*~*

Miscellaneous FB updates of you...


Yakee to me: Mommy, do you know why you're very beautiful? Because I love you so much.

Then later, he asked me to guide his hand in making a heart so he can write "I love you" (sorry, I dunno how to make a heart here)... then he said, "this is for you Mommy, I love you so much".

Yesterday din, he got our neighbor to write a letter for him... and the letter basically said, "I love you so much because you love me so much."

Haha... sana this sweetness at 5 will last forever! I am basking in the pure glory of it!

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As karma to me letting our 7-year old neighbor babysit my kids for me, Yakee is now going around saying he has a crush (because neighbor girl has a crush on her friend) on his classmate too... and that Yamee has a crush on him because Bunso kissed Kuya.

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After getting into a cab
Driver: Sa'n daan natin Ma'am?
Me: J.P. Rizal
Yakee: Mommy, where's the jeep ni Rizal? :D
(While we were driving to school naman mahal, Iakob said that he saw Maxwell and his twin brother (which he forgot the name of the brother). Me knowing that it was also a name starting with "M", teased him, s it Mcdonalds? ... "Pappie No!", Mariano? ... "Pappie No!", Mustafa ... Pappie No he is not a vegtable (Thinking of mustasa) !!!)

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Because Yamee was throwing a tantrum during lunch (and our attempts at comforting him or distracting him weren't amounting to anything), hubs and I decided we will just let him cry it out and we'd just comfort him after he's calmed down a little.

Yakee came to us brandishing a wooden sword, looking very upset. Then, on the verge of tears, he said, "I am angry to you. I take care of my brother but the two of you don't."

Yes.... sumbatan :D

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While walking from school to Power Plant Mall a few weeks ago... we passed by a huge drawing of a peen on the wall Yakee has a habit of jumping from. Yakee said, "Oh wow, look Mommy, a drawing. I think that's Mickey Mouse."

:D

Thankfully, the vandalism WAS rather plump in its rendition, haha.

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It's more fun if you visit museums with your kids :D

(haha, sorry sa lack of reverence for the art of the Masters) —

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Yakee: Mommy, you are the Mommy grouch. I am the Kuya grouch. Yamee is the baby grouch and Pappie is the Pappie grouch. We are Spanish.

(I dunno why he insists on announcing these things.... we have been penguins, birds, cats, molehogs, etc but ngayon lang kami nagka-foreign nationality!)

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Asked hubs to get boxes from work and he also got some from MIL for our decluttering plans... but the boys have turned the balikbayan box into a slide, and the other boxes into tunnels and 'grouch' homes...

so.. pano na?

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Let's just say... you each have your own brand of naughtiness :)

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Yakee just talked in his sleep... and said... "I will just stay here and wait for you, ha, Mama"

Awww... now I feel guilty already for possibly having to leave the house many times next week!

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Yakee: Mommy, I know 3 things from you.
1. Do not play with the eggs (he means the uncooked ones)
2. Do not rip the box (because I tell him they become useless), and
3. Do not run away from you (in public, because he might get into accidents or someone might snatch him)

Yes... in 5 years, yan lang naituro ko sa kanya :D

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I seriously hope that getting hit in the head by a book by your child... because you suggested for him to stop learning to read for the day... isn't part of regular homeschooling...

Hayst.
(I scolded him syempre and reminded him of rules 1) never hit, and 2) books are sacred. Then I explained why I was suggesting we stop. I explained na him being restless is his body's way of telling him he has to move.

Then I reminded him of our new homeschooling rules... 1) we homeschool everyday, 2) other activities are part of homeschooling... so he need not be scared we're not going to read or count or paint again, and that play is part of homeschooling nga)

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Yakee told me last week na he wants, even if he can read already, for me to still read to him sometimes. Yinakap ko ng todo syempre and sinabihan na I want that too

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Yakee put on a puppet show for us. I wasn't sure which was more wonderful... his attempts at storytelling that way, or the wonder in Yamee's eyes as he watched his Kuya.

You Are Now 5

 

You LOVED celebrating your birthday and would only-too-happy remind us that you will celebrate 3 times... the lunch with Pappie's family, the one at St. Michael and the trip to the robot zoo.

 

I also noticed that you were just sooo sweet and more eager to please coming into your birthday... and at my PTC with Tita Maricar, she echoed how you took charge of playing with and being patient with Dejan because you knew the others aren't as patient with him. That's Big Brother attitude and we love you for it. Tita and I also noticed how calmer you are generally, and she reassured me that you can deliver on instructions.

 

As at home, you don't like drawing at school but like painting... Tita also said you don't like playing house much there and still prefer physical activity.

 

You were sick days before our birthdays and just ended your medication and nebulizing tonight. Sigh. But as always, you were a trooper.

 

I had to spank you the other day for pushing Yamee off the sofa... which resulted in him hitting his head on the floor. I write that now here to let you know that you still get spanked (though very rarely now), you still have moments of overexcited hands... and juxtapose that to how loving you are as a brother (you'd often need to be reassured that Yamee was okay without you, you insist on getting hugs from him when you get home from school, you like playing with Yamee and would go berserk when he doesn't want to play).

 

Now... you are living for the Robot Zoo trip and the Bohol trip, because you're excited to see the tarsier.

 

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Miscellaneous FB Updates :)

 

 

Two moms I spent time with last weekend just recently found out that they're preggers... for their third child.

God... I am not taking this as a sign!!! Not even with Yakee having told me earlier that Yamee grew in my tummy because he asked God for a playmate.

 

*~*

 

I think I will really invest in these multi scarves just so they can play pirate and ninja in style :D

 

 

*~*

 

Me: Know what, we might be going to Museong Pambata with some of mommy's friends (talking of a Rockers plan to play date there).
Yakee: Good mommy. You know there is a computer there, but it's a different computer. It's a key computer. When you press the keys, some will get stuck. So, I will pull at them and they will not be stuck anymore. Then, I will press again and the keys will get stuck again.
(after thinking long and hard)
Me: Oh darling, that isn't a computer. That's a typewriter you're talking about.

:D

I think it's time I bring out our old one...

 

*~*

 

Yakee: Mommy, when is Ninang Josephine coming back?
Me: Oh baby, she's coming back after a long time... you will be seven years old by then.
Yakee: Hmmm... then I will be a man, and when Ninang comes back, she will say..."where is my Iakob" because she will not know it's me. Because i'm already so big.
Me: Yes, probably.
Yakee: Yes, Mommy... I will be a man that time and taking care of Yamee.

*~*

Yakee: Pappie, when I grow up, I will be a big man like you.
Pappie: Yes.
Yakee: Then I will marry Mommy.
Pappie: No, Mommy is married to me already. You will find someone to marry.

(all this talk of growing up... maybe because he's turning 5 in 3 weeks' time)

 

*~*

While trying to explain to Yakee that we need to do something that will still allow me to draw pictures of Yamee's feet... he said, "Mommy, I wish you have more hands so that you can do everything with me and Yamee."

Since he wanted to play luksong-tinik, I told him I needed more than extra hands for that.

*~*

While reading Apolakus (an Adarna House purchase from the MIBF which I really love), I paused to ask him, "How would you feel if other kids took away your lunch?"

Yakee replied, "Oh it's ok Mommy, there are no enemies at my school. Nobody will get my food."

(yes, my son is assured he'd get to eat at @St St Michael Playhouse Makati because they all even help in food preparation)

 

*~*

 

And just like that... without me prompting him, teaching him, terrifying him, training him or bribing him... Yakee can read CVC words and even wrote BAT on his own.

It won't be a big deal to those who are following the more traditional way of preparing their kids for school... but it is proof that barring special needs and limitations, children will bloom beautifully on their own, without 'interventions' from parents and educational programs. (sept 19)

*~*

Their current brotherly trick is jumping from the headboard of our bed together...

*~*

This is a fire hydrant just past Ateneo Business school (?) in the Rockwell area which we pass by when I fetch him from St Michael... he's really bummed my Android phone broke because I can't take pics of him there anymore.

*~*

I dressed the boys in matching pyjamas (gift from Ninang Karla last Christmas). Yakee said, "Mommy, I think we should make Ninang XiAh see us on webcam."

I said... "Oh sorry baby, Mommy's laptop is broken, that's why I couldn't work all day."

Yakee said, "Ahhh... so you can play with us!"

Laya can I plead 'birthday blues' to my children to justify the extended PC use? No? Awwww.... :D

*~*

In the dark, while nursing Yamee and caressing Yakee to sleep... Yakee says, "Mommy? I am making a heart shape with my hands. It's for you because I love you so much."

Sigh. I think Yakee will kill me with sweetness sometimes, haha.

*~*

Hubby's post:
Iakob my dear son... 5 years have gone just like that. Be as sweet and as loving always! Happy Birthday Panganay!

*~*

Earlier....
Me: You know, when I was a little girl, i loved camote so much. I like it when it's still piping hot and I'd remove the skin and then mash it with butter and sugar. I'd eat it like that.
Yakee: That's good Mommy. That's a nice dream.

I really laughed so hard... yes, at 35, your childhood somehow feels like it was all a dream.

*~*

Instead of stressing myself in creating banners and what-nots for Yakee to wake up to tomorrow... I chose instead to cram and work on his birthday story.

Unfortunately, I am doing more crying than writing. I am doing more reminiscing than writing.

And in the background, Yamee is hooting.

*~*

He was perfectly created and is growing up beautifully... thank you, darling, for making better persons out of me and Pappie

*~*

Yakee: But Mommy, when you and Pappie sleep together, that is so BAD! (with matching tears)

Nope... he hasn't caught us in the act, he is just trying to argue his way back into the family bed and doesn't care who he ousts, me or his father. Eh, I told him Pappie and Mommy cannot sleep apart :D

*~*

There isn't a perfect hacky sack here... I struggled till the end (and there are many rejects, haha). But Yakee was in mind the whole time I was making them... of all the years we have been blessed by him. And so, I hope his friends will still enjoy them :)

Thanks to St Michael Playhouse Makati for letting us celebrate our son's birthday with them.

*~*

Hubby Jojo had the idea of gifting Yakee with something that appeals to the senses (wahaha, told him in Waldorf, there's 12 senses, so he's got a theme na till Yakee turns 17).

He bought him new binoculars and this.

The prob now is... how do we bring it to Bohol without breaking it? :D

'Reading' Now

It's your greatest accomplishment and milestone for the month of August: pretending to read by repeating to us the stories we read from your books. Your father is sort of trying to inspire me to finally teach you to read but I still haven't done it. I will do it after your 5th birthday... after St. Michael. After your brain has reorganized.

Plus, a part of me wants to honor this 'pretense' at reading and just let you be... to see which stories have really become  a part of you... to see how much you've committed to memory... and how long this will last.

You're back to not liking it going to school and I think it's because there is so few of you now in the half-day class. What propels you out of bed is the idea that getting through a day will get you closer and closer to Date Day and Watch Day (which is Friday).

You've been asking for a skateboard and I have mandated that you have to learn to ride a proper bike first. Pappie is doing his research on how to keep you safe on a skateboard, should that be something you really want to do in the future.

Oh... you also like pretending a lot that you're studying, writing/drawing continuous zigzags on a notebook you got from Oona. It's really quite cute.

And you were so happy gardening with Pappie... so, when the cat pooped on the planter, I just had to give you a new hope in new and more plants. Hopefully, your brother will stop picking them for us to harvest something.

I know it's unfair sometimes when I ask you to model good behavior for your brother... but I also appreciate all the effort I see in you when you try for patience and gentleness. Most of all, I like it that you are your brother's greatest defender.

I love you, Panganay. I really do. I thank God for you everyday and pray that we will always be close.

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Miscellaneous FB updates:

May plano kang layas... magkakasinat ang anak. So, hindi ka na aalis. Tapos yung anak mong may sakit, mas maingay pa sa kinakatay na baboy pag naglalaro.

Ganun talaga.

Kaso naman anak, sa lamay naman ako dapat pupunta.

Next time, ha?

*~*

(annoyed because Yakee kept slowing us down)

Me: Mahal, come on, hurry up please. Mommy has to be somewhere so we don't have much time for our date. Time is precious.
Yakee: No, YOU'RE precious. You are the precious one and you're MY precious.

Shucks... syempre, I extended the date... ako pala si ring that binds them all eh!

*~*
while sobbing)
Yakee: Mommy, when you leave me alone, it always breaks my heart.

(another one)
Me: Are you scared that I might die and not come back when I go away somewhere?
Yakee: Yes, because if you die... then I will keep on waiting and waiting for a long time.

My SIL's mother's passing recently got me thinking of morbid possibilities... and Yakee unfortunately picks up on them like an empath. He kept crying when I went to the wake a few days ago... and couldn't sleep tonight, upset, because I attended the burial earlier.

Hayst. (posted Aug. 19)

He calmed down lang (after a long dialogue and lots of hugs and tear-wiping) when I told him that God calls us all back to His side... and he decided that if he's back in heaven, he will play there.

*~*

Yakee 'read' to us last night by reciting stories from memory... he later told us he could READ because he immitated how I sounded (very Waldorf, right St Michael?). Pappie and I absolutely burst with pride and joy... and that bittersweet feeling when a child crosses yet another threshold. (posted Aug 23)

YES... all the bumps and falls and crashes didn't damage their brains!
(You read Curious George and the Dog Show... and Si Pagong at si Matsing that first night and we haven't really read to you 95% of the time since... I actually really miss it)

*~*
Playing with the birthday ring with mahjong-like movements... hmmm...

*~*

Yakee to Yamee: If you cannot sign or talk, I will not let you borrow my toys.

tsk. pressure!

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You're not just sweet with Ninang Grace, lately, you have also been expressing sadness and longing for Ninang Gang.

Growing Sweet and Thoughtful

You are generally more mellower, more easy to cooperate, more thoughtful and sweet. In fact, I sometimes get weirded out by how gushy you get with affection... wondering if you're up to something :D  Not that I don't appreciate it, my love, I do...

I really love our date days too... and maybe, that has something to do with how cooperative you've been. I can see how much you've grown and matured when it comes to Yamee, and I know that your brother is sooo sure of your love for him too.

You still love being read to, still love watching TV/movies (but can only do so every Fridays and Saturdays), still love toasted bread and butter as well as scramble eggs. You're slowly learning to eat more meat but still hate fats and gristle and texture.

You suddenly can't get enough of bananas. And you've un-learned being OC about underpants. See, there was a time when you refuse to wear shorts or pyjamas anymore without underpants :)  Sorry darling, but since it's hard to dry clothes nowadays.... this is a plus for our helper.

I don't know how you'll handle losing your new best friend, Chase... but I'm sure you will adapt, and know that Mommy's heart will break with yours as you deal with yet another growing pain.

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Miscellaneous FB posts:

A mom told me earlier that her daughter told her about how my son helped her yesterday... by getting the towel some other boy was hitting the girl with.

I was also told by one of the nurturers that my boy is so grown up and matured already, helping them with the other children.

We are so mighty proud of you, Kuya Yakee. This is all you.

~*~
Yakee: Mommy, Can I tell you something?
Me: Yes.
Y: Mommy, i'm so proud... and happy. I love you very much because you're always making happy sacks for me.

(he meant hacky sacks and purposely calls them that because he says they make him happy... haha... and yes, this is one of the perks of embracing crafts, suddenly, you're like a magician in your kiddo's eyes)

~*~
Pappie: Don't tell Mommy what you told me about why you're wearing all white, she will cry.
(Yakee giggles)
Me: What?
Pappie: Sure ka, you want to know?
(me getting nervous as morbid thoughts come to mind)
Pappie: Go on Iakob, tell Mommy.
(Yakee giggles again)
Yakee: Mommy, i'm wearing all white. I look like i'm going to a wedding.

Waaaahhhhhhh.......

~*~

I couldn't help but feel senti... my firstborn is just really not a baby anymore, even if he'd always be MY baby.

~*~

I never understood the rewards of domestic chores and crafts... until I started doing them, and seeing how Yakee appreciated me making things for him.

~*~

(sms exchange)
Pappie: enjoy your date later
Me: thank you for letting me date another man... and for giving me money for it too :)

(while eating ice cream by the fountain at Power Plant Mall)
Yakee: Mommy, this fountain was very sad kanina.
Me: How come?
Yakee: Because nobody was sitting here and enjoying the fountain. But now, it's a happy fountain because we're here.

I love Friday date days with Yakee!

~*~
Yakee: Mommy, you know what's making me sad? Your words.

Ugh.

After watching an old episode of Criminal Minds last night, I thought of talking to Yakee about losing him in a public place and what he can do (stay put in the last place he saw me). I thought I was doing it as casually as possible... unfortunately, he got so upset about it.

~*~
while walking from school

Me: Oh my, Iakob look at the clouds. I think it might rain again.
Yakee: Hmmm... I think Jesus said, "No rain until my son Iakob is home."

Sure enough, it was still only drizzling when we got home after our date.

~*~
(posted by Tita Kat)
Thanks so much for the present, Chase has been playing catch with daddy. Chase is already missing his best friend he said!
(my reply)
Awww... that's the same thing Iakob said last Thursday when we were on the way to the mall... that Chase is his super best friend!

We will miss you both surely :)

~*~

Like wolves at the moon, the boys are howling at the rain through our lone bedroom window.

Hopefully, it addresses their cabin fever...

~*~

I couldn't resist but turn on the news last night. Images of flood everywhere was on the TV.

Yakee: Wow, that is so nice.
Me (aghast): No darling, flood isn't nice at all.
Yakee: No Mommy, not the flood. The sailboats (lifeboats) are so nice because they're going to rescue people. Help is on the way.

Sigh. I have always told him that, when he hears sirens, help is on the way... but it is I who forgot to look at the glass as half-full. Thank God though that he listens to what I say.

And with that, despite the raging rain last night, I managed to sleep better and not fret as much.

~*~

during our bedtime prayer

Yakee: Papa Jesus, I miss my friend, the sun. I want to see my friend because the plants also miss the sun.

God... what your will is, will be. But if it's really not too much to ask, please let the rains stop.

before napping

 

~*~

Yakee: Mommy, is that the sun?
Me: Yes, I believe your friend, the Sun, is back.
Yakee: I think God heard me singing so He took the rain away and gave the sun back.

...

~ he was referring to yesterday, we were sitting outside while watching the rain and he thought of playing his guitar and singing to chase the rain away
~ I should not have started him on mere outlines and stick figures which greatly limited his art (rectifying it!), but that's his drawing of what we did yesterday... where he's sitting with his guitar, and his hat is on the floor, and in the flood floats two slippers he tried to rescue
~ amazing, his faith that God listened to him :)